TECHNIQUES OF A CRIMINAL PREDATOR
Updated: Jan 21, 2019
CHARM AND NICENESS - We must learn that niceness does not equal goodness. Niceness is a decision, a strategy of social interaction; it is not a character trait. People seeking to control others almost always present the image of a nice person in the beginning. Like rapport-building, charm and the deceptive smile, unsolicited niceness often has a discoverable motive.
FORCED TEAMING - Forced teaming is an effective way to establish premature trust because a we’re-in-the-same-boat attitude is hard to rebuff without feeling rude.
LOAN SHARKING - The one I call loan sharking: “He wanted to be allowed to help you because that would place you in his debt, and the fact that you owe a person something makes it hard to ask him to leave you alone.”
TYPECASTING - Typecasting always involves a slight insult, and usually one that is easy to refute. But since it is the response itself that the typecaster seeks, the defense is silence, acting as if the words weren’t even spoken.
TOO MANY DETAILS - When people are telling the truth, they don’t feel doubted, so they don’t feel the need for additional support in the form of details. When people lie, however, even if what they say sounds credible to you, it doesn’t sound credible to them, so they keep talking.
UNSOLICITED PROMISES - “I’ll just put this stuff down and go. I promise.” The unsolicited promise is one of the most reliable signals because it is nearly always of questionable motive.
DISCOUNTING THE WORD ‘NO’ - “No” is a word that must never be negotiated, because the person who chooses not to hear it is trying to control you.
TRUST YOUR INTUITION
Trust that what causes alarm probably should, because when it comes to danger, intuition is always right in at least two important ways:
1. It is always in response to something.
2. It always has your best interest at heart.
THE MESSENGERS OF INTUITION